Shame is one of those completely useless emotions.
Shame is the emotion that I feel impacts me negatively the most. I still deal with times and moments of shame, and it feels completely useless after the fact.
It does nothing for us except keep us down, keep us small, and keeps us feeling disempowered. It makes us feel disconnected from our loved ones.
Shame can also be incredibly selfish because it leads us to only think about ourselves and how we feel.
If I am ashamed about something that I had done to someone else, I am still thinking about myself in the end.
“If there is something that I need to forgive myself for, or that I have done, then what is stopping me?”
What is stopping you from forgiving yourself?
The best medicine to shame is to spend your time finding something else to do. Use this to focus outward instead of inward on yourself.
Do something generous for someone else to forgive yourself. When you find yourself in shame, you can lovingly and jokingly say “You are in a self-indulgent moment here.”
When most of us experience shame, we usually feel shame about something that is not quite as bad as how we feel.
If there is something that you hold as a secret that you feel shamed about, tell someone.
The saying “we are only as sick as our secrets” holds true. I promise you that telling somebody this secret can take the power away from it.
Tell someone, I promise you it’ll take the power out of it. So today you need, we get to live a shame-free life. Cause I’m, I’m declaring now and today that shame doesn’t work. I’ve known that, but then when it takes over you and gets that shame energy in your body, shake it off. Forgive and give out.
I encourage you to start living a shame-free life. Shame does not work. shake off that shameful energy and forgive yourself and allow yourself to focus outward.
Originally published at https://bethosmer.com on February 7, 2020.